An Unpopular Opinion on Potty Training

Generally you hear parents bragging about how young their kid was potty trained, but I always said I was going to wait a while to potty train Aidan.  You may be asking, why in the world would you put off potty training?  More butt wiping, more diaper money, what are you thinking?!  Well, to understand why we need a physiology lesson.

When a child is in diapers, they’re free to pee and poop whenever they have to, and their bladder is free to grow as they grow.  The earlier you potty train your child, the earlier this growth stops.  Potty training is essentially teaching your child to hold their pee and poop (until they stop to use the toilet).  Kids – all kids – prefer to keep playing rather than stop frequently to use the bathroom.  When a child holds pee or poop it exercises the bladder and can cause thickening of the bladder wall (which decreases the available space inside for urine). Holding poop leads to constipation; constipation and held urine create the perfect environment for urinary tract infections.  Eventually the muscles in the bladder can become so strong from constantly holding urine that they’ll start to spasm and can cause children to have accidents.  This is called dysfunctional voiding.

So how does this normally go down?  A child that’s potty trained early will appear to be fine, but may eventually start having accidents (pee and poop) or getting recurrent UTIs.  They see their pediatrician and may eventually be referred to a pediatric urologist or nephrologist (kidney doctor).  Does this happen in every instance of early potty training? No, of course not.  Does it happen a lot?  Actually, yes.  None of this is meant to scare; it’s mean to bring to light an often unpopular opinion.  Waiting to potty train isn’t exactly something that most parents brag about to one another, but it might be something that could be in your child’s best interest.

So, when IS the correct time to potty train?  Of course it’ll vary child to child, but here are some signs your child may be ready:

• Asking to have their diaper changed after they soil it
• Expressing interest in others using the bathroom
• Having a dry diaper for longer than usual
• Waking up from a nap with a dry diaper
• Telling you that they have to pee or poop (or that they just did)

Most kids will start to show these signs sometime between ages 2 and 3 years.  The more ready your child is, the smoother the potty training process will go.  Want to know more?  You don’t have to take my word for it!  Here are a couple good resources:

Maybe a little scare tactic-y, but still good information from a pediatric urologist: Here

Another pediatric Urologist’s Point of View: Here

Dysfunctional Voiding, from Boston Children’s Hospital: Here

So, what do you think?  Being a nurse is weird and makes me opinionated about the strangest things…  Do you have any unpopular parenting opinions?

PS – Be sure to read my disclaimer about health care related posts on the blog.  I’ll link it here, but you can also view it any time under the Disclaimer section on the blog’s main navigation bar.